This past month we moved from DC to New York. Our schedule went something like this:
Dec. 23 - 25 - Pack, purge, celebrate Christmas
Dec. 26 - Movers pick up stuff
Dec. 27 - Painters, cleaners, final touches, move to a friend's place
Dec. 28 - Quit jobs, tenants move in
Dec. 30 - Fly to Florida
Dec. 31 - Jan. 11 - Cruise, Happy 2013!
Jan. 11 - Andrea flies to NYC; Ben flies to DC
Jan. 12 - Movers drop off stuff at 7 AM; Ben and Jack-Jack arrive in NYC that afternoon
Jan. 12 - 13 - Unpack, organize, purge
Jan. 13 (evening) - First day of b-school orientation
It was a whirlwind month, but Ben and I came out of it feeling like new people. For a girl who lived in the same house her first 18 years of life, never accumulated much stuff during college, and lived in one place post-college, this was a big move. I want to capture a few lessons learned from the process.
1. Stuff is just stuff
Prior to our move, I prided myself on being an anti-hoarder, the minimalist. Our moved made me question every part of this self-proclaimed identity. In DC, we had two bedrooms, two bathrooms, a large front room, a small kitchen, a loft, a pantry, four big closets, and two storage cabinets. In New York, we have one bedroom, one front room, two closets, one storage cabinet, a tiny kitchen, and one bathroom*. We didn't want to put anything in storage because let's admit it - if you can store something for 16 months and not miss it, you probably don't need it.
The equation was simple. Current DC possessions > Room for NYC possessions. So, the grand purge began. In November, we cleaned out all of our closets and the pantry. We hauled a couple of bags to Goodwill, threw out expired food, and felt pretty good about ourselves. When we packed in December, we got serious about getting rid of things. Redundant items that made the cut in November weren't so lucky in December. We hauled away two carfuls or stuff, but still were moving 20+ boxes and a decent amount of furniture to a one-bedroom New York apartment.
b) I never want to buy new things unless something breaks. I'm over shopping and consumerism. I will buy services, I will buy food, but I do not want more products in my life.
3) Murphy's Law Part B - If you have space, you will fill it. Thus, less space can be a good thing because you realize what is essential versus a luxury.
2. The process makes goodbyes easier
Ever since I first saw NYC, I wanted to live here. When I finally had the chance to move here, I didn't instantly jump at the opportunity. I deliberated over the decision for months for several reasons. One of the main reasons was my attachment to DC. I have lived in DC for almost 1/3 of my life. I loved our lives. I loved our home, our neighborhood, our friends, our ward, our favorite spots, our dog park...the list goes on. I knew that even if we return (which we're planning on), things wouldn't be the same as this season of our lives.
At some point in the last month, I had the epiphany that while moving is literally the process of detaching physical possessions from a place, it also encourages detaching emotionally. Even in the final weeks before leaving DC, I had mixed emotions of being sad about goodbyes but so excited for New York. By the last day, I was so ready to move on. Between working through what seemed like a never ending to-do list and working at fast pace for days/weeks in a row, I started focusing on the end goal of leaving. Moving almost needs to be hard to help overcome all of the positive associations and attachment (which will still live on. don't worry, dc peeps).
3. Moves are a good time to disappear
We told most people that we were cruising in between the move, yet so many DC people we thought we were already in New York and no one in New York was expecting us until the day we arrived. It was fun to be off the grid. It was also the perfect time to sandwich in 11 days of quality sun time between a busy end to DC and a busy beginning to New York.
*Besides the freezing temperatures last week, the only big adjustment for us has been sharing a bathroom. Silly, I know.
Dec. 23 - 25 - Pack, purge, celebrate Christmas
Dec. 26 - Movers pick up stuff
Dec. 27 - Painters, cleaners, final touches, move to a friend's place
Dec. 28 - Quit jobs, tenants move in
Dec. 30 - Fly to Florida
Dec. 31 - Jan. 11 - Cruise, Happy 2013!
Jan. 11 - Andrea flies to NYC; Ben flies to DC
Jan. 12 - Movers drop off stuff at 7 AM; Ben and Jack-Jack arrive in NYC that afternoon
Jan. 12 - 13 - Unpack, organize, purge
Jan. 13 (evening) - First day of b-school orientation
It was a whirlwind month, but Ben and I came out of it feeling like new people. For a girl who lived in the same house her first 18 years of life, never accumulated much stuff during college, and lived in one place post-college, this was a big move. I want to capture a few lessons learned from the process.
1. Stuff is just stuff
Prior to our move, I prided myself on being an anti-hoarder, the minimalist. Our moved made me question every part of this self-proclaimed identity. In DC, we had two bedrooms, two bathrooms, a large front room, a small kitchen, a loft, a pantry, four big closets, and two storage cabinets. In New York, we have one bedroom, one front room, two closets, one storage cabinet, a tiny kitchen, and one bathroom*. We didn't want to put anything in storage because let's admit it - if you can store something for 16 months and not miss it, you probably don't need it.
The equation was simple. Current DC possessions > Room for NYC possessions. So, the grand purge began. In November, we cleaned out all of our closets and the pantry. We hauled a couple of bags to Goodwill, threw out expired food, and felt pretty good about ourselves. When we packed in December, we got serious about getting rid of things. Redundant items that made the cut in November weren't so lucky in December. We hauled away two carfuls or stuff, but still were moving 20+ boxes and a decent amount of furniture to a one-bedroom New York apartment.
One of several Goodwill runs
Once all of our stuff arrived in New York and we saw the box/furniture to square footage ratio, all emotional attachment went out the drain and we threw things in the donation pile with a reckless abandon. We took a taxi full of stuff to Salvation Army our first weekend here. We gave bookshelves, chairs, and a table to new classmates just getting settled. As of yesterday, when I dropped off the final four items at Salvation Army, we officially have a lean and mean, trimmed down life. I love it.
Too. much. stuff.
A couple sub lessons learned:
a) I love the cloud. It's like I can have my cake and eat too. I just scan all of the cards, papers, photos, etc. that I want to hold onto, and I get to keep electronic copies while not having to haul filing cabinets around.b) I never want to buy new things unless something breaks. I'm over shopping and consumerism. I will buy services, I will buy food, but I do not want more products in my life.
3) Murphy's Law Part B - If you have space, you will fill it. Thus, less space can be a good thing because you realize what is essential versus a luxury.
2. The process makes goodbyes easier
Ever since I first saw NYC, I wanted to live here. When I finally had the chance to move here, I didn't instantly jump at the opportunity. I deliberated over the decision for months for several reasons. One of the main reasons was my attachment to DC. I have lived in DC for almost 1/3 of my life. I loved our lives. I loved our home, our neighborhood, our friends, our ward, our favorite spots, our dog park...the list goes on. I knew that even if we return (which we're planning on), things wouldn't be the same as this season of our lives.
At some point in the last month, I had the epiphany that while moving is literally the process of detaching physical possessions from a place, it also encourages detaching emotionally. Even in the final weeks before leaving DC, I had mixed emotions of being sad about goodbyes but so excited for New York. By the last day, I was so ready to move on. Between working through what seemed like a never ending to-do list and working at fast pace for days/weeks in a row, I started focusing on the end goal of leaving. Moving almost needs to be hard to help overcome all of the positive associations and attachment (which will still live on. don't worry, dc peeps).
Jack-Jack was glad to say goodbye to bubble wrap and boxes
We told most people that we were cruising in between the move, yet so many DC people we thought we were already in New York and no one in New York was expecting us until the day we arrived. It was fun to be off the grid. It was also the perfect time to sandwich in 11 days of quality sun time between a busy end to DC and a busy beginning to New York.
Ben, not hiding behind boxes
*Besides the freezing temperatures last week, the only big adjustment for us has been sharing a bathroom. Silly, I know.
2 comments:
I love this post. It is scary how easy it is to accumulate "stuff".
I forwarded this to Neal for him to take note since he loves this topic. I wanted to write a post like this when we moved because I felt a lot of similar things, though we still held on to way more than we need. What can I say, I'm a work in progress!
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